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Dear Masculine (Divine and otherwise)

Please do not take this the wrong way. We the Feminine have been awakening into our power. And in this awakening, there is a lot of pain that we must see to heal and eventually forgive.

You see, dear masculine, we have been suffering for a long long time. Decades, centuries and lifetimes we trusted you to be who and what you offer us when you come to awaken your trueness… We wanted you to fulfil your initial soul contract, the entire reason for incarnating into life, to be our world, as we will be yours.

Our soul contract was to love you unconditionally. And to deny this unconditional love would mean that we no longer want you or desire you to become. But we the feminine have unconditionally loved you, as a whole, as a being, as a collective, and as an energy. And with all of your destructiveness. Over and over again we forgave you. After every incarnation, we gave you another opportunity to right the wrong, and become right in the right. You see dear masculine, you are and have been more than destructive, you deny your love.

In being in denial, you tortured your feminine energy within. You fear the power of the feminine energy will over power your masculine, but what you have not and never realized, is that your feminine energy is who you are as well… for this feminine energy is emotional, and is a part of the entire reason for incarnation, life, and purpose. You see feminine energy is emotional, mental and soulful in you, and by denying your love for your own feminine energy, you have abandoned the feminine woman who stands beside you. She is the one with whom you have promised to protect. Not hinder, but protect her in a way that only you can… with your own unconditional love and being free to love and be, just as she will love you unconditionally, and be free to love and be.

From the very beginning of life on earth, the soul contracts were not fulfilled with their purpose, and because the soul contracts were subjected to contracts made within the life, the soul contracts were forgotten, or masked through the lower vibrations that living in a body on earth creates. And the historical life on earth created huge traumatic karmic akashic energy between you the masculine and us the feminine. And with these karmic akashic energies, comes dark thoughts and negative feelings toward you. We trust and you trust, however in your destruction of your emotions, you destroyed us too making it very difficult to understand who you destroyed the one being that you can not live thrive or exist without.

You see, by causing trauma, either through violence, denial of free will and suppressing of being equal, the balance of power slide too far to you, masculine, imposing your destructiveness onto us as well. You see, we are and will be the only being that can truly heal you from being the only one who can destroy to create, however, in your power, you began to destroy your healer, the one and only one who can temper your power, and in your unchecked power, you destroyed to control, you destroyed to destroy the love that we hold.

All is not lost, for there are beings entwined in this realm of life in divine, for there are some beings who have the higher purpose to find the true meaning and reinstate the purpose. These beings are having to clear away muck, muck that has been building up and has been too much. These beings have been around for many a millennia now, in different lifetimes, on different planets, in different dimensions and have some answers to be and recreate from the destruction they see. And in the recreation, there is a healing and forgiving as well.

For every lifetime, where the contract was not fulfilled, there must be a clearing of the trauma we had. Then there must be a healing within, a healing between, and a healing to be. After that healing, forgiveness will come, and the akashic karma will be no more, and the to be is never to repeat the been, for as masculine ascends, their power to be the contract keeper becomes, will be as once before, before incarnating, before darkness took over.

So have some patience as we unweild the pain, the mistrust of the power that you are, for masculine, we as well can not survive without you, neither in body, nor in energy, nor in the cycle of life that is made.

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Having Sex Does Affect Your Soul

What is sex? The definition according to the dictionary is sexual activity, including specifically sexual intercourse. And that is just the basic act of having sex. But what we soulful beings sometimes do not realize is how having sex affects your soul’s energy.

Let’s refresh. Your personal soul is a part of and the overseer of a greater energy field that includes your personal aura, your chakras within your body, your shushumna, nadis, pingala, ida and meridians and your spirit that holds your personality characteristics. It also is connected to chakras above going up to source/Divine through the Galactic cord, and to the earth chakra with the grounding cord. Your soul’s incarnation begins invitro during the first trimester, when your body’s heart starts to beat. This is when your soul begins to enter your body through the heart and merges with your body and creates the energy sectors called chakras. The first chakras to connect is the root chakra, sacral chakra and solar plexus.

Now within the heart chakra there are micro copies of each larger chakra. This is how the energy of the soul remain intact and functions as the template for the chakras as they are formed. However, the copy that descends into your lower regions of your body (your belly) picks up lower vibrational energy throughout your lifetime that may also damage the chakras within your heart, which makes it difficult for your soul within your body to feel safe enough to shine.

So picture as you will, your chakra system, from root to crown through out your body, with a carbon copy in your heart.

Now back to the topic of sex and how sex affects your soul.

When you have sex, the chakras give and receives sexual energy from the other person to you and from you to them. The energy exchange during a sexual encounter is strong. It can be either high vibrational or low vibrational.

We are energetic bodies, and during sexual intercourse, the energy of each partner mixes. Every sex act is an exchange of energy because every sexual act raises or lowers your energy level.

When a man interjects his sexual energy into a woman it passes through her root chakra and cords into her sacral chakra. The woman receives this energy and gives him sexual energy of her own. These cords stay connected to the woman long after the encounter and is reflected within her heart. This is why typically women associate sex with love.

When you think about how strong the energy is from the sacral chakra, as it is evident during pregnancy. There is a unmistakable bond that happens when women give birth. The baby invitro creates attachment cords to her womb(sacral chakra) which in turn is mirrored in her heart chakra. The same connection between womb and heart exists during sex. An attachment cord is created during sex. Think of the energy cord as an arrow with a fish hook at the end. This is the tether. Attached to the tether is an energy cord from the man.

From a man to a woman, the tether embeds itself into the woman’s chakra which in turn sends energy to her heart. If there is love energy attached in this energy arrow, then the heart responds and the sex love energy grows and is invited and encouraged to repeat. However if there is no love included with this arrow, then the heart feels the lower vibrational energy and begins to put up an armour to protect itself and the soul energy that it is. And the sacral micro chakra in the heart chakra area begins to get close itself off from the sacral chakra in the body attached to the womb, and her sexual energy.

Whether the sexual encounter is a part of a loving relationship or not, the exchange still happens. The attached cord affects the root, sacral, solar plex, all the way up to the heart. And because the bond is so strong between the woman’s sacral and heart, she is affected whether the exchange was for pure love, or for just sexual release. Obviously if the exchange was pure soul love, the energy is positive and high vibrational, however if the exchange was not intended for love, the energy is low vibrational.

In a perfect world, a woman wants to invite her beloved man into her gateway, to form a stronger high vibrational loving bond ideally with the heart, head and soul, and the man would be willing and wanting to be invited to form this higher vibrational bond. However this is not a perfect world, and not all everyone who are invited intended to create or preserve this high vibrational energy bond. And when the loving relationship ends, the cords remain, but she may feel deceived by the man… maybe not through conscious thought, but the heart’s mind or soul consciousness is very aware and in dis-stress and eventually dis-ease.

When the sexual encounter is just momentary and casual, the cord still attaches, but since there is no love connection, the arrowhead imbeds itself, but the cord breaks off to a thread and even like our own body, can get so deeply imbedded that we do not even realize that it is there. But like a foreign object it does cause discomfort and pain. And this pain causes scarring from the energy hook in the body sacral chakra, and blockages in the carbon copy in the heart.

Casual sex affects the woman’s chakra system more negatively than a man’s because the man’s cord attachment is outside of his body, and connected to his root. However the hooks and cords within other women eventually send negative vibration to the man’s root chakra and can also negatively affect his sexual energy. It can stop his energy flow from moving throughout his body, making him feel tired and lethargic from all the negative cording that she gave to him, upon his root.

When it comes to a rape, not only is the man not invited,(which leaves scars) but he cords of negative energy goes through her root, into her sacral chakra, and that negativity affects her solar plexus, and heart. And when he is finished, the cord and tether is then ripped right back out by the woman, scarring her sexual energy, her love, and her very being with negative feelings and thoughts.

How to release yourself from unwanted cord of low vibrational sexual energy.

First of all you need to get yourself into a space to heal. You need to get away from all distractions such as driving, cooking, cleaning, and really get into your meditative space. There are many high beings available to help. Arch Angel Michael with his flaming sword of death, Manjushri’s sword that cuts through illusion, and Rama’s sword of destruction will work. You will want to invoke them, with their swords and see them cut through the cords that bind to your sacral chakra from whomever has corded into you. Ask them to remove the tethers that have been imbedded, as the tethers can reform the cord. Next you need to heal your chakra where the tethers came out, and any scarring that occurred. Mother Mary, Gaia, Shakti and Pavarti are wonderful for healing the wounds of unwanted, either during or afterwards, sexual cords and tethers. Do not forget to cut the cords, remove the tethers and heal the scars in the micro sacral chakra that is in the heart centre. This is how you can free yourself from energy given that is not the high vibrational energy that we all need, want and deserve.


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Pondering Earth’s existance

Since my awakening, I have pondered the purpose for our souls and the purpose of living.  And through my pondering, I have been given insights that make sense to me and I am writing this for those who also ponder and wish for insight that makes sense to being alive, on Earth, as souls within bodies that carry so much Karma.

First off, let me reiterate what Karma really is, and what it is not.
Karma is not the energy of I get hurt or traumatized this lifetime, and I get to hurt and traumatize another for revenge.  Karma is not like that.  Karma is not vengeful.  Karma is not experiencing all toxic energies to uplift the soul.

Karma is energy that is stuck in your soul’s eternal energy, your Akashic Records, and your soul needs to access the records to remove the energy that the Karma from past has stuck in your souls eternal energy to free the soul.  I think of Karma as the peanut butter residue that remains in the jar.  That unless you know how to remove the residue, it will remain, as a constant reminder that there is residue in your jar.
That reminder can show up in this lifetime, as it has shown up in previous lifetimes.  That the Karma is there, holding your soul in the toxic energies from other people, other beings, other lifetime has subjected upon your soul.  And that is the way that this way on Earth has unfolded.

However, that was not the design.  For the truest design for Earth was to create a lifetime for really removing the toxicity of the Karmic cycle through a powerful energy called Love.

How was it designed?  How could it be stronger than any other life existence on any other planet you may ask.

“We came up with a design that through time was the first, and the last.” said the Divine.

What design is the first and the last? asked I.

“The power of the love between one soul split into 2 – a bond that designs only living loving and flourishing will do.”

How can that be done?

“By creating the bond as the ultimate one, the only one that will do the healing of the Karma, the toxicity that causes the darkness that puts out the energy of the soul”

So what was designed?

” As said in the scriptures, before they got altered, the Gods and the Goddesses designed the body that would house the soul, on a planet designed to be used by the body, ensouled by the soul to have dominion, have a home”

We designed with the help of other lifeforces called Annunaki, for they were given the ability to alter genes of beings within incubators that we had designed and given the design to an Annunaki named Enki.  However to be able to bring the design to Earth, we made a deal with the Annunaki for their help to use the design to create beings that would give the Annunaki the gold that they seek.  So they created a being that we now call Neanderthal, to work in the gold mines without the soul that the Divine are.

So the Neanderthals were the design that were slaves to the Annunaki general called Enlil.  For that general was the one to bring the gold back to his people in exchange for the design of the house for the souls – Homosapien.  The design that the Divine would use to heal their souls, their people.  Unfortunately, Enlil got too greedy, and the Neanderthals, since they were not soulful, were subjected to an evil that subjected the new design for the body for the conscious souls.

For greater knowledge and understanding here are some terms to tickle your mind and soul

Homosapien:

homo – A Latin word meaning person –  persona, homo, caput, spiritus
Sapien – a Latin word meaning “one who knows, wise, has knowledge

 
So I conclude in a more spirited level, that a Homosapien was designed to bring the divine consciousness through spirit into their being as a person, life and love. For love is the power of the divine with the wisdom to share and the power is all and everything divine.
 
Meanwhile Neanderthal man. (often lowercase)Informal. an unenlightened or ignorant person; barbarian. a reactionary; a person with very old-fashioned ideas.
 

Both Homosapiens and Neanderthals existed at the same time on the planet. Science has proven this and have actually acknowledged the creation and evolution of people. I can see where the purity of both species got intertwined. But the energy of the Neanderthal of being unenlightened transferred into creating the humans that we are today. However, we must also remember that we also carry the pure enlightened energy of the original design for the devine – for the Homosapien.

So a great evil that took place as the rape, pillage and the power to subject the divine souls to a slavery within the body to lifetimes of anguish, trauma and oppression through Karma.  (the peanut butter residue)

For this evil was sneaky, it is not always seen.  It subjects the souls to vampires, demons and devils called arkons.  Witnessed as cephalopods, with great big tentacles with suckers that stick to the aura, the chakras, and their energy of being.  The suckers they grow, and they call in reinforcements, and these suckers can remove the souls ability to be.  And these cephalopods have been hunting us, you and me.  They attack and when Divine intervention takes them out, they break off within our aura and hid within our dimensions and wait for an opportunity to grow, sometimes this lifetime, but most often the next, and the next, until the soul is so bogged down from their vampiric nature that the soul does not even recognize itself.

So our intended design for the souls divine was to create a souls purpose for love to heal the trauma from past lifetimes.  But we got invaded again by Annunaki who we thought were our friends because we purposed them to design a being to house our souls to be finding our ultimate soulmate – the other half of the whole soul.  Remember that a soul in a body is only half of the whole, as the initial soul was halved in the very beginning of soul.  No matter what is thought, written, seen, a soul from Divine creation is 2 souls, one energy and that energy is only to be loved and to love the other half of the soul as one, meaning to love and be loved by your truest spouse, wonder and sole mate, is to love and be loved by yourself.

I understand the Divine intention was to bring their design to the planet Earth as creation, to be one with the other, and live a life with struggle.

“That’s only part of it.  The struggle was only supposed to give the 2 souls as 1 (marriage) the ability to overcome physical obstacles, to over come the survival of the life, with the ultimate healing of the soul with in the body, within the life to overcome the Karma from past lifetimes, where the Divine has been thwarted by evil and darkness.”

To keep clearing the body, that houses the energy of the chakras, and the aura that is directly attached to the body and chakras and Divine, as we struggled with survival, which became survival of the fittest instead of survival for all.  For while our design had the ability to bring Divine power, it got corrupted by Annunaki greedy energy.  Now before we begin to condemn the Annunaki, we also must realize that there was one being that has never been acknowledged as part of the creation, – the mother of souls.  She has been called Sophia, and she is married to her twin soul, her soul sole mate.  Lets call him Allah – the divine being who uses his power to control the creation of life.  While the Annunaki Enki was designing the body, Sophia was designing the energy system for the soul.  Since energy is not seen as a physical thing, it is sometimes hard to imagine.

However it is there, within our bodies.  It physically is in our bodies as our nervous system, our thoughts and our feelings.  What else could it be, except energy.  Even scientists can witness thoughts and feelings within our brain, (our mind chakra for survival in living)  however they have no idea the source.  They have just mapped that the energy exists and affects our brain and how we perceive our life, our circumstances, our being.

So science has proven the existence of energy, and we all know about consciousness and what it means to be conscious of being – right?  Do we? Are we? Should we be?  That is next time for now it is time for me to ground and go do the tasks on the physical plane of existance.

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The train and the stop

When you feel like you are going insane

And you can not seem to get off of the train

Just up a head is a stop that you can see

But to get off would mean that you need to be

brave enough to take the jump

a leap of faith and that is the hump

that keep you within your train of destruction

that leads you to a land of nothing

keep sitting and watching the train run the track

and see everything is just the same

running around in a cycle that needs to end

the train is a new hell, one that you are on

and sitting inside will keep you not going on

to your end of the ride, but jumping off and then you might fly

to a place that has more meaning and comfort and bliss

but you have to stand up and take the hint

Get off, Jump now. for the train is slowing down

because there is something up there in the way

it is the one that will take you safely away

this one is not only the one slowing the train

for this one is not alone this one has a name

and this one is the one that you have been waiting for

and this one is the one that you are destined for

and that is you in you perfect essence to be

the perfect person that you can see

deep inside of your self as you ponder your way

this person is waiting for you to get out of your own way

wake up from your nightmare

step into your dream

for you and only you can see that your dream is more real

keep sitting and waiting will only make it worse

for something is telling you that you are on the wrong track

so listen to that something, your best intuition

and take that leap, the leap of faith

that your best intuition will lead you to your destination

which is not on the train that is driving you insane.

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Pandemic

Chances are, you are going to get it. You may get the dreaded Coronavirus. It will happen to the best of us, despite all of best social distancing, or self isolation, or even quarantining yourself. It may still happen.

We all have the opportunity to take this time to see yourself. Really look inside and see who you are. We are all afraid of dying. But guess what… No one is getting off of this existence alive.

Not even the ones who are doing it all right.
Not the righteous.
Not the rich.
Not the poor,
Not the young,
Not the old can escape this fate.
That is the only thing that is inescapable.

The only thing we can do is live. It has been said that the dash between your birth and death on your obituary is the most important part. So what are you doing in your dash? How are you living?

By distancing in fear?
By shopping in panic?
By stoning the ones who do not follow the masses?
In crying because you are afraid to see?
This world which has turned on itself to be
Not my world.

In my world, we distance to help out the healthcare
We shop not in panic, but relatively cautiously
We offer an understanding that we are not perfect
Not even the ones who are following orders

We can only sit here and accept our fate
And wait for the day that the vaccine is made
And while we are waiting, we offer a thought
On how we can improve only ourselves

For when we all look inside and stop looking out
We will see that all that we are, what we could be but aren’t

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The fallen have fallen

Oh how the mighty has fallen.  The corporate world has fallen to a small unseen parasitic energy that feeds fear and panic it the constructs of the earth.  And yet as we panic and believe the sky has fallen what happened to be belief of the other unseen energies, ones that feed love, and calm, and compassion.

We witness this parasite not with our own eyes, but by the ones with the equipment and the training to do so.  We put our faith into these employees of the science and health organizations.  For good reason.  They have seen the destruction and witness the danger.

“Why believe them and not in me” said God.  “I am unseen.  I am witnessed by ones that have been given the equipment to see, and have trained to do so.  Why not put your faith in them, and in the ability to see what they witness to be the coming of beings of light, of love, of home during these dark times.  Witness them and believe.”

We are the soothsayers, the empaths in the higher energy planes.  We are witnessing energy change.  We have been chosen to witness Allah who is God who is Shiva and Brahma and all of the high beings that the world all believes in.  We are the 144000 and we are here to save your world.

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A message in a bottle

Wake up, the world is changing.  Wake up it is time to change too.

While this world takes on a self imposed quarantine you have much to do.  The way to the new is to repair the old and make way for the change that will continue to be anew.

Review all of the times that man and woman would exist.  Review when the man would contain so much hate for his fellow human that they would kill.  And remove that energy.

All that is and all that is meant to be will emerge as one.  take comfort in the way. bring in the templates of new. as you remain the way that you are. Watching waiting with Allah and Joe for a time to emerge when Allah is Joe and Allah is you.  Remember your true mission of twin flame union and bring the energy to the earth as its darkness weakens.  Wake up the world.  It is changing.

Wake up the woman that exists within.  The wonder, the lover, the twin flame soul sole. Wake her up to be beauty that will unfold.  Wake her up with an energy that shes kept hidden deep inside of the woman that she had been.  All that she is and all that she will be will be because she was always the given.

Let him be who he is meant to become.  Let him realizes his spot in the world that is waking up.  You sent him a wonder inside of his energy.  Let him wake up so he can reveal it.  He will be who is was always meant to me.  A wonder, a Lover the twin flame soul and friend to the wonder that will always be Allah.

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Replace the panic

~a channeled message from the Divine high beings to you who has the desire to see

With all of the hoop-law regarding the coronavirus,  there has been lots of problems with fear and the effects that it will cause.  Many have been searching for their fear to be relieved by squandering their common decency and buying massive amounts of common items, while the whole time, their fear of the future rests upon this life and not how they live it.

When you consider that we are all eventually going to leave this world as a being of life, we are also portraying that our life is not worth being at peace, within ourselves as to the very existence that has been. We are trying to control all of the darkness that has been unearthed.  The darkness is consistent with past, past lifetime of dying from infectious disease,  and all the times that the virus is attacking we feeding the energy of common fear out to be re-lived as panic and our actions on this planet are reciprocal to the fear.

Calm yourselves let the masters work.
heal yourselves let the antibodies work.
Clear yourselves.  keep your thoughts and energies sacred. 
Make peace with who you truly are. 
Raise your vibration and be one with all
and you will see the result will be glorious
with minimal pain and suffering for all.

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Blind Spots

(3D Reflection)

Yesterday, I was driving down the road.  The road that I was travelling on had 4 lanes, a right and left lane in each direction.  I was travelling in the right lane, and needed to merge into the left as I would be turning left further up the road.  I checked my rear view mirror,  and then my side mirror, and the way seemed clear.  I didn’t check my blind spot, because I regularly check my mirrors and I had not seen any cars approach, and thought that I was clear to make my merge.  I signaled that I was going to merge, and veered into the left lane.  After merging, I noticed in my rear view mirror, that there was a car immediately behind me, and I fear that I may have cut him off.  The sight of this car astonished me, as I was not expecting it to be there, and thanked God that I didn’t get hit or hit him.

That got me thinking about my side mirrors.  They are adjusted so that I can see the back corner of my vehicle.  But it’s view is limited.  I thought about what it was I should be seeing, and expanded my side mirror view point so that I am no longer seeing the back end of my vehicle, but more of the lane beside me.  (I figured that I do not really need to view the back half of my van.  I know what it looks like, and the colour.  Every time I looked in my side mirror, I only verified that my back end was following me.)

(5D Reflection)

After adjusting my side mirror, to reduce my blind spot, I got thinking about our blind spots in living within this universe.  I got thinking about my mirrors, and what reflection that I am seeing.  I figured my rear view mirror really reflects my past.  I can see, feel, reflect, and see my reflection upon my past.  The right side mirror and left side mirrors are more adjustable, but if you are only adjusting them to see the back end of your past, you really are not seeing everything.  You are only looking at your past, but from a different view.

However, by only looking at your past from a different reflection, you are missing a blind spot.  And by that blind spot, I mean energies that sit there that unless they are reflected upon, are not seen.  These energies do not travel with you to necessarily assist you.  Some of these energies are hinder some, and destructive, waiting for you to take a wrong turn, merge or detour.  These energies could be karmic energies from past lives, lower energetic beings intending to harm, block, discourage, or blind.  And some of these energies are more darker yet, in the forms of demons or other entities hanging around waiting for an opportunity to knock you down, and devour your energy.

There are energies that are sitting beside you in your vehicle that we call life.  These energies can be your guides, your gods, your goddesses, your soul team.  They are waiting for your acceptance that they are there.  Waiting for your decision to accept their help, to transcend, clear or heal the darkness in your mirrors.  Waiting for you to wake up.  Waiting for your awareness.  Waiting to help.

You are much much more that who your are right now.  Much of your upset come from that which travels around you, in your blind spot.  Wake up and adjust your side mirror.  All can be seen, All can be cleared.  All can be taken and sent to the void.  Talk to your team, your guidance, your higher self.  Talk to the one that you love as yourself.  Bring all of your energy that you are now, and light up the blind spot so that you can see the energy that you are being deceived.

(Message for me)

Yes, my wonder is being deceived.  She sits and she cries within these walls and has difficulty being alone with herself.  She fears that if she is alone by herself, that when she is wakened, she will be the great being all alone.  And yet here she sits wondering to herself does she really want to be all alone within while her beloved is not all alone within himself.  There is one thing within that makes him not see, as he only sees what only he has seen, and not the choking he does to himself, or the darkness in his blind spot that whispers to him,”We are not really there”. And he can not see them.

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Triggering of Abandonment

The triggering of abandonment runs deep.  Deeper than I thought I knew.  It begins long before, lifetimes ago, as a little baby girl, born and given back in the mountains so cold.  Laid between 2 stones, to keep warm and stop the cries, as the mother walks away, leaving her for the God that she denies.

It begins many times, more than I knew.  As it happens many lifetimes that I have tried to live, ended in torture, and murder and ends with being chosen over by other mistresses, or lovers, or wonders.  It ended with being a woman without the acceptance of being of goodness.  It became the pattern of living within a world that does not love a woman within the wonder of the union.

when all of these happening had happened to try to gather the darkness that this world does hide.  When all of the darkness is sent to a girl, a wonder of all, but not to the one who gave birth.  While this one did not bury the girl deep on the woods, she did deny her the love that comes with being a woman with her girl, and not a woman with only a son.

And this was the life that I have, the one that I am trying to overcome.  My triggers of abandonment start long ago, another time, and the beginning of this one.  It runs deep in my core, the one that I am trying to remain as I know that I am.  The pain I carry is one of many.  And I have the plan to heal and clear for all that I can heal and clear, including me.

Without my pain, without my abandonment, without my unworthy of being loved, I can not heal for everyone.  Yes you are my monkeys, and you are my circus.

 

Keep them close.  The mothers of the universe.
Quan Yin
Ama
Shakti
are only a few.
Goddess above, more ancient than I can know
Send me your love.
Send my your healing and keep this feeling of unloved from resurfacing
Transform to a place of utmost power
One of Keeping the faith for the one that will always be my love
No matter what he does or doesnt do.
It is only with this upset that I can see the abandonment issues deep inside of me.